Posted by: Martin Scherer | 30/04/2011

A right royal wedding?

I guess I can’t write a blog on either side of the pond without mentioning the wedding. 


It was just a wedding! The most expensive and broadcast wedding in thirty years, biggest internet event ever, that will prompt a thousand U-tube videos. 

He could have had a haircut, the Archbishop. Those eyebrows!  At one point, I thought his eyes were going to fly away like the eyes of angels.

A million Facebook photo’s – I was there or in a street party. I pity all those guys in the church who didn’t see a thing because some woman’s big hat. Should have stayed in the pub to watch it on TV.

Did you see how long it took Will to get the ring on her finger? In the pub we agreed, he isn’t getting that off quickly. She’s made sure of that. “Check Mate Kate, you bagged the king”

At the moment the couple said, “I do”, you could hear a pin drop in cities outside London. No one committed any crime, no one had an accident, no one came on heavy, no one died, but three babies were born. We should have more days like this.

Did you see the sheik singing Jerusalem in England’s great and glorious church?  Elton John, Posh & Bec? Prince Andrew’s daughters looking like chubby chavs. No Fergie of course. She and Diana were airbrushed out, along with Tony Blair, Gordon Brown, and the Ambassador for Syria.

Kate really is the perfect princess. A commoner who is more than a commoner. You could not have planned a better choice. The Queen’s delight and relief were visible. At last, some member of her family has made a wise choice. From a heritage of coal miners there are some really common people who have just discovered they are now related to Royalty. Over generations, Kate’s family have risen through the ranks to know their place at each stage. Now at the top, she will be a solid wife, produce her 2.2 or maybe four, all perfectly timed, and she knows her man will often be sorely tempted. No worries. Kate’s mummy will make sure of that. No divorce on some distant horizon. William knows the pain of that, so he won’t be going there.   

Did you see crowds on London’s streets following a thin blue line of police without running clashes, chucking stones or smoke bombs? Did you see how many foreign faces and American voices were amongst the crowds? London is the most cosmopolitan city in the world. Strange to see foreign faces with foreign voices, draped in Union Jacks and wearing crowns. The days of Britain’s Empire may be long gone but Kate will be Queen of a dozen and more countries.

That dress said it all. ‘I am beautiful, I got quality and I’m in charge, dear boy.’ The power behind the future king who will restore the monarchy to its rightful place. Married to its people.

So why did the Church have to introduce fear into it all? Married in the fear of God? What was that about? Good lecture from the pulpit, self-centred ego destroys marriage, but isn’t it time the church got into the 21st century? All male ceremony, all male choir?

Wasn’t it formal? “Give her a hug mate,” came the shout in the pub. They hardly ever touched, but every guy in the pub was getting a handful of his woman, thinking what every couple would be doing tonight. That is where the population come together, renewing their vows whilst royalty make theirs. 

The British Monarchy are back on track for the next generation. Will and Kate will become the most photographed and recognised faces on this planet.

We have more such pomp and ceremony to come. Next year is the Queen’s Jubilee. Then Kate will give birth. Then the Queen will step down leading to a Coronation. No more than one a year please. It’s great for tourism and British economy. British TV already dominates the world and Britain has just provided the most glittering global event for thirty years past and thirty years to come. Thank God the US declared independence or this wedding might have taken place in New York!       

And Will drove Kate away in the James Bond car.  Go for it!


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